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Entertainment Media Analysis Report
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(2006), PG-13 [R-13*] (1hr 13min)

Analysis Date
CAP Final Score
CAP Influence Density
February 16, 2006
28 out of 100

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Christian Long Distance

(This section may be and sometimes is somewhat subjective.)

If Scriptural references appear, the full text appears at the end of the Summary / Commentary.

(2006), PG-13 [R-13*] -- ... not worth the effort ...

Cast/Crew Details Courtesy Internet Movie Database
Production (US): New Regency Pictures, Regency Enterprises
Distribution (US): Twentieth Century Fox Film Corporation
Director(s): Jason Friedberg, Aaron Seltzer
Producer(s): Jason Friedberg, Arnon Milchan, Jack L. Murray, Paul Schiff, Aaron Seltzer
Written by: Jason Friedberg, Aaron Seltzer
Cinematography/Camera: Shawn Maurer
Music: David Kitay
Film Editing: Paul Hirsch
Casting: Amanda Harding, Amanda Koblin
Production Design: William A. Elliott
Art Direction: Daniel A. Lomino
Viewed At: Driftwood Theater 6

Date Movie is nothing more than a gross-out sex flick with an attempt at a feel-good ending. Subjectively speaking, it is empty of any intellectual challenge. But then, I guess that is a form of art. Art is not sin and sin is not art, but when art uses sin it becomes sin. And, yes, even today sexual activity outside of a monogamous heterosexual marriage is still sinful. Why? Because God's Word does not change. Thank God!

Date Movie is rated PG-13 for "continuous crude and sexual humor, including language." The MPAA got that right ... except for the rating. Date Movie earned a final score in the range of scores earned by R-rated movies. That makes it another R-13. A "hardcore" R-13.

Fat, hairy and crusty Julia Jones (Alyson Hannigan) with a heart of gold cannot find a man. So she tries to flaunt sex appeal to capture one. It doesn't work. A noted professional counselor named Hitch (Tony Cox) who has a string of abbreviations after his name on the door, who is also a minister, takes Julia to a gang of machine shop workers who do some bariatric surgery on Julia and make a beautiful woman of her with a grinding wheel, an electric drill, epoxy glue and various other machine shop tools.

Then Julia finds a man, Grant (Adam Campbell) whose last [stage] name I will not print. Grant became amorously interested in Julie when she was obese. But now that Julia has become beautiful, his interest is peaked.

Grant has an ex-girlfriend, Andy (Sophie Monk) -- a 100% sexual relationship -- who again becomes interested in Grant when wind of Julia's marriage to Grant comes Andy's way. The battle is on. And through it all is just about every form of gross-out, crude, sexual vulgarity called "humor" the human mind can conceive. [Eph. 5:4, Gal. 5:19 ]

Foul language is used as if salt on popcorn. [Col. 3:8] God's name in vain is freely used as well. [Deut. 5:11] Sexual/anatomical display are as if Kinsey wrote the film, as if there are no standards or inhibitions left whatsoever. There's more. Lots of camera angles to focus on the female anatomy, including the crotch from behind (in near thong dress). Repeatedly.

One exceptionally long skit was of Campbell feigning an orgasm. Licking kissing. Co-stripping for sex. Frenzied making out. Vulgar dance. Gross self-touching. Demanding a sample of ejaculate (after given a porn mag plus a sample cup) to determine Grant's fertility. Yes this is a PG-13 film, mom/dad. Need I say more about the acceptance standards of the MPAA for your 13 year old children?

I will speak of the vulgarities in the film only so much and you can rest assured it is woefully less than was actually displayed and demonstrated. If you think it is gross to read such here, guess what your kids see AND hear if you let them attend this flick? I am not going to spend any more time on this Summary/Commentary for two reasons. One, this analysis is being posted on opening day and, though I have very little regard for this type of filming I respect those who yet might want to see it and do not want to spoil it any further on opening day. Two, I am going to let the listing in the Findings/Scoring section speak for this film because this film is not worth the effort of writing a thorough Summary/Commentary.

I will say one more thing. With an examples per hour rate of sexually immoral behaviors, demonstrations, language, etc., of 77.3 per hour, this 73-minute actual program time film averaged more than one example of sexual immorality per minute. Probably more since I can write only so fast.


If needed to focus or fortify, applicable text is underlined or bracketed [ ] or bold. If you wish to have full context available, the Blue Letter Bible is a convenient source. If you use the Blue Letter Bible, a new window will open. Close it to return here or use "Window" in your browser's menu bar to alternate between the CAP page and the Blue Letter Bible page.


  • Eph. 5:4 Nor should there be obscenity, foolish talk or coarse joking, which are out of place, but rather thanksgiving.
  • Gal. 5:19 The acts of the sinful nature are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery;
  • Col. 3:8 But now you must rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips.
  • Deut. 5:11 Thou shalt not take the name of the LORD thy God in vain: for the LORD will not hold him guiltless that taketh his name in vain. [Vain is shav' {shawv}: emptiness, nothingness, vanity, such as an expletive. With or without the four letter expletive, the use of God's name in any way other than respect, reverence or thoughtful discussion is in vain. That includes the popular three syllable sentence with His name trailing it AND the misuse of Jesus' name.]

    ***Selected Scriptures of Armour against the influence of the entertainment industry***
  • Ps. 12:8 The wicked freely strut about when what is vile is honored among men [e.g., create progressively vile/offensive entertainment with impunity and no consequences to younger and younger audiences every year when enough people continue to defend it, embrace it, pay for it, enjoy it, want it].
  • Col. 2:8 Beware lest any man [by his influence] spoil you through philosophy and vain deceit, after the tradition of men, after the rudiments of the world, and not after Christ.
  • 1 Cor. 15:33 Be not deceived: evil communications corrupt good manners.
  • Rom. 5:19 For as by one man's disobedience many were made sinners, so by the obedience of one shall many be made righteous.
  • Jude 1:4 For there are certain men* crept in unawares [secretly slipped in among us], who were before of old ordained to this condemnation [whose condemnation was written about long ago], ungodly men, turning the grace of our God into lasciviousness [a license for immorality], and denying the only Lord God, and our Lord Jesus Christ. [*men: anthropos {anth'-ro-pos}, generic, a human being, whether male or female]
  • Matt. 25:40 And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto [or for] one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto [or for] me.
  • Luke 17:2 It were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and he cast into the sea, than that he should offend one of these little ones. [Offend: skandalizo {skan-dal-id'-zo} - scandalize; to entice to sin; to cause a person to begin to distrust and desert one whom he ought to trust and obey; to cause to fall away. I suspect "offend" includes sexually abusing the little ones. "Little ones": mikros - little;, small of age; younger which can include at-home teens].
  • Ps. 119:133 Order my steps in thy word: and let not any iniquity have dominion over me [let no sin rule over me].
  • John 14:15 If ye love me, keep my commandments.
  • 1 Thess. 5:22 Abstain from all appearance of evil. ["Evil" includes all things that are sinful.]


    As always, it is best to refer to the Findings/Scoring section -- the heart of the CAP analysis model -- for the most complete assessment possible of this movie.
    (The objective heart of the CAP Analysis Model, independent of and insulated from the Summary/
    Commentary section.

    Date Movie (YEAR) CAP Thermometers

    Wanton Violence/Crime (W)
  • slapstick violence, repeatedly, some graphic
  • beating
  • theft
  • rotted body
  • motions of murder/beating
  • assault

    Impudence/Hate (I)
  • 28 uses of the three/four letter word vocabulary
  • one use of the most foul of the foul words with key letters asterisked out
  • massive tattoos
  • long sequence and repeated sequences of toilet toilet humor
  • racism

    Sexual Immorality (S)
  • pelvic thrust in dance and in other activity, repeatedly
  • camera angle/pose to force viewer on private parts, repeatedly, frequent
  • vulgar dance, repeatedly
  • homosexuality mannerisms, inferences, references, suggestions, repeatedly
  • moving marquee with man licking dog's tongue
  • dressing to maximize the human form and/or skin exposure, both male and female, repeatedly, frequent, both heterosexual and homosexual
  • statue nudity, full male frontal
  • licking kissing
  • rear nudity
  • excessive cleavage and/or breast exposure, repeatedly
  • vulgar self-touching
  • nudity hidden by moving blot
  • long sequence of feigning orgasm
  • co-stripping for sex
  • frenzied making out
  • sounds and movement of orgasm
  • man and woman in bed together
  • gross self touching
  • demanding ejaculate to determine fertility
  • gross-out sex and anatomy humor, repeatedly, some vulgar
  • animal copulation with dead human body
  • condoms
  • crotch kicks, repeatedly
  • anatomical references as sexual humor, repeatedly
  • teaching young son to pimp
  • inappropriate touch, repeatedly
  • rubbing face between breasts (partially clothed)
  • vulgar sex references/talk, repeatedly
  • sex therapists for teens
  • exaggerated anatomy, repeatedly
  • revealing swimwear
  • below navel skin threatening to expose that which follows
  • vulgar gesture
  • arrogant talk of sexually immoral deeds
  • rude gaze
  • crotch grab
  • implied bestiality, repeatedly
  • sex talk in background music

    Drugs/Alcohol (D):
  • drinking, repeatedly
  • booze, repeatedly
  • smoking
  • sniffing aerosol

    Offense to God (O)
  • two uses of God's Name in vain with the four letter expletive and 6 without
  • "Jesus juice"

    Murder/Suicide (M)
  • suicide by nailgun
  • seven gunfire murders

  • Christian Educators Association International



    There are some in the entertainment industry who maintain that 1) violent programming is harmless because no studies exist that prove a connection between violent entertainment and aggressive behavior in children, and 2) young people know that television, movies, and video games are simply fantasy. Unfortunately, they are wrong on both accounts." And "Viewing violence may lead to real life violence." I applaud these associations for fortifying 1 Cor. 15:33. Read the rest of the story. From our more than eight years of study, I contend that other aberrant behaviors, attitudes, and expressions can be inserted in place of "violence" in that statement. Our Director - Child Psychology Support, a licensed psychologist and certified school psychologist concurs. For example, "Viewing arrogance against fair authority may lead to your kids defying you in real life." Or "Viewing sex may lead to sex in real life." Likewise and especially with impudence, hate and foul language. I further contend that any positive behavior can be inserted in place of "violence" with the same chance or likelihood of being a behavior template for the observer; of being incorporated into the behavior mechanics and/or coping skills of the observer. In choosing your entertainment, please consider carefully the "rest of the story" and our findings.

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